Saturday, February 26, 2011
Tragedy strikes my family again, When will this ever stop?
Last night I got a phone call from my mother-in-law telling me to come over that my 11-year old niece Joceclyn's dad past away and they needed me before they told her. This was around 9pm, so I jumped up put on my coat cried a little and put on my strong face one I learned from my mother. I actually called my mom when I was driving there so I could get all the fear and stress out of my system. I pulled up in front of my in-laws house and the overwhelming sadness was thick in the air. To keep myself busy while I waited for my sister to return from the corner store and Jocelyn's other dad to get here I salted their walkway. Stupid because I was freezing, my hair was wet from my bath I had just gotten out of and scared for the little girls in the window watching me not knowing that in a manner of moments her world was going to change forever. Finally everyone was here and I went on the deck to have a smoke and then I heard the wail of Jocelyn crying and I had to got to her. She was sitting between her mom and dad crying saying she did not want him to die and that she was never going to see him again. Then she would bury her face into her mothers chest and scream out again. It was agonizing. Angie and Kenny kept telling her it was ok to cry and that no matter what her dad would always be looking down from up above watching her and loving her. What makes this difficult is that Jocelyn is disabled she may be physically 11 but emotionally she is more like 5. So we were telling a five year old her daddy just died, how can anyone comfort and make since of it. It was one of the hardest things I have ever witnessed. I have gone through alot in the last few years. But this little girl deserves some peace. After a little while Jocelyn and I were singing songs together from my Ipod and she was playing with my hair and her father Kenny had bought her a happy meal and finally Jocelyn was calm and as normal as she could under these circumstances. I had to go home because my daughter and Aireonna (Joceclyn's little sister) refused to go to sleep because I was not home and they new I was upset when I left. What little angels they are. My husband who is my rock and the glue that keeps us all together was sitting on the couch with Meagan on one side and Aireonna on the other. I knew everything will be ok as long as we all stay together and strong. Now all I have to get through is the very scary spinal surgery I am having Wednesday. Like I said will the stress ever end for my family!!!